Things that make John Boehner cry:
--Baby ducks swimming in line behind their mother on a lake.
--The scent of rose petals.
--Watching Larry King’s final night on CNN.
--Moonlit walks on the beach late at night with his beloved (himself).
--Rainbows, puppy dogs and lollypops.
--Every rendition of “God Bless
--The daily memory of his humble roots.
--The feel of faux animal fur on his sensitive skin.
--The bumps and grinds of a stripper at The Royal Palace on
--Other people named John.
--The sound people make when they mispronounce his name “Boner,” “Banner” or “Limbaugh.”
--The memory of crying fits from the past.
--All of those “P” women (Pelosi, Palin, Plinton).
--The heart-rending tale of the illegal immigrant who cleans his home.
Things that make John Boehner laugh:
--Children without health insurance.
--The feel of genuine animal fur on his wife’s ruddy skin.
--The excruciating agony of others.
--The thought of global thermonuclear war.
--The idea that he’ll soon be third in line for the Presidency.
--Hearing people say the term “Jewish holidays.”
--Sexual abuse of children through the clergy.
--Watching video of rogue cops beating people senseless.
--Hearing people whine about that BP thing.
--Someone else’s misfortune.
--The stench of rotting flesh.
--When smart people try to pronounce all them fancy words.
--Unexplained hair loss.
OK, I believe that my work here is done.
Ooooo. Everyone is hopping mad at Obama and I admit so was I for about 20 minutes until I calmed down and put things into perspective. I also watched a little Chris Matthews which also helped. I am now way back in Obama's corner and getting tired of everyone pissing and moaning because rich people get to hold on to their tax cut for another two years.
This week the House of Representatives voted to disburse funds for a settlement claim made by black farmers who were denied federal loans because they were black. It was passed with the help of 16 Republicans which in this political climate is a groundswell, but that bipartisan support was tempered by the subsequent behavior of the Republican race warriors. Michele Bachman (surprise surprise) accused the claimants of fraud and demanded an investigation. Steve King got up and cited a story of how one claimant named “Johnny” was actually an urban dwelling drug addict who filed for the money in the name of his father. Then he blamed Barack Obama for paying out these “reparations.” Was the story King told true? I’m going to go out on a limb and say no, he was just taking from the “say anything to make white people mad” playbook (ahem, death panels).
Frauds? Drug addicts? Reparations? The only thing missing from their screeds was the rampant use of the word “darkies” and intermittent tobacco spitting. What makes it more sickening is the $251,973 in government subsidies received by Bachman’s farm between 1995 and 2006, thank-you Wikipedia
Bachman and King are doing everything to represent the white people who are bent on the paranoid delusions of what
Hey Michele and Steve, your people are STILL winning. You are the Michael Jordans of making money and no one contests that. Just remember, while Michael Jordan was the best, he never tried to keep other players off the court. He was a classy competitor who raised the bar in a way that made the game more interesting for everyone. Why can’t you do the same thing? Oh yeah, because you’re mentally unstable racists. Sorry.
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