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Friday, February 8, 2013

State of the Union 2013 Pre-Complaint

Manipulated photo depicting Beyonce performing at upcoming State of the Union address
Oh, U.S. Constitution Article 2, Section 3. What a monster you have become. All it says is that "from time to time" the president shall give Congress information on the state of the union. W was briefed on Katrina damage with a DVD capsule of news coverage compiled by aides. Wouldn't this be a more effective way for the president to fulfill his constitutional duties to Congress?

The TV news class gets so excited for this annual borefest, gabbing over what they think the prez is going to say and then trying to be first to report on what the White House has leaked of the speech. Afterwards they chew on the bones of the speech by speculating over what lines meant what. I'm predicting lots of useless discussion. We are six months out of where the height of election season. In that time, we have seen the president:
1. Give an acceptance speech at the Democratic National Convention
2. Debate
3. Campaign
4. Give an election victory speech
5. Hold press conferences
6. Give an inauguration speech
7. Make statements concerning recent events

Am I missing anything? Is there anything new we need to hear Obama say for the time being? Are we going to put a man on Neptune? Like every year, we are basically getting pumped up for a digest speech of (stuff) we've heard a thousand times before, packed in between fillers of "that's not who we are" and "that's what makes us great."

A real state of the union address would be even more boring than what it already is. As suggested by the constitution, it should read like a spreadsheet: corn prices are up, manufacturing is up, government spending is down, etc. What the speech has actually turned out to be is a layout of the president's agenda. Now, if the president wants to present a state of the union spreadsheet to Congress and then make a speech in front of a joint session entitled "A Layout of My Agenda," that would make more sense. It would be even better if he forewent the speech in a post-election year like this one.

Obama is like Bill Clinton. They love to hear themselves talk and granted, they are quite eloquent dudes, but no one in America is getting obese on eloquence, figuratively speaking. This is the age of the tweet, and while I don't really get the Twitter concept, people seem to love it. So Mr. President, if you have something to say, change your name to Barack Obooboo Child and keep it to 140 characters or less.

As an after note, Article 2 of the Constitution refers to the president only as "he."Has the Republican party found its way to discredit and delegitimize a President Hillary? Stay tuned.

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