Still Waiting

Eight months into the Administration of Barack Obama there have been a record number of threats against the president. People have brought weapons to gatherings near where Obama has spoken. Protesters have held signs depicting him as a bone-wearing witch doctor. It makes me wonder, what’s going to happen when we elect a REAL black president? Obama is, after all, half white. Don’t get me wrong; I accept Barack Obama as the first black president – with an asterisk. Obama’s actually darker than me and both my parents are black so I give him points for that too. But I know we can get blacker. Blacker than Mugabe. I’m thinking someone dark enough to be played by Djimon Hounsou (or a woman equally eneboned).

Currently, the darkest person in politics I can think of is Alan Keyes who actually happens to be a conservative so yes he’s black, but I don’t agree with his policies so I’d be torn. Though, it would be interesting to see if a Keyes presidency would inspire the wrath of the same “folks” who are beside themselves that they have a black president who really ain’t that black.

To lay it on a slate upon which we can all agree there ARE people who are miffed at the president’s race. Even people who are accused of being racists like Rep. Joe Wilson admit this contingent exists and then go on to insist their own hostility to the president is completely color-blind. So, even though it may be difficult to find someone who admits to harboring resentment against a black president (Joe Wilson), everyone admits they walk among us. Exactly where they sit on the political spectrum is no mystery either. Liberals have historically been the seekers and defenders of racial equality. The vast majority of black elected officials serve as Democrats. The vast majority of black voters vote for Democrats. Meanwhile, once every four years Republicans on camera at the Republican National Convention when pressed on the issue insist that while the GOP is a “big tent party, we haven’t done as well as we’d like in expanding our message.” Note to the Republicans: While it wouldn’t be fair to label you the Party of Racism, everybody knows that people who are moved to violent thoughts at the fact that our president is part black are more sympathetic to your party. Deal with it or don’t.

It is also the Party with which very few black people align themselves with such exceptions as Alan Keyes who ran for president as a Republican in 1996 and 2000. In the event that the sun stopped shining, hell froze, and Keyes was elected president, would he face the gauntlet of threats and slights against him based on his race to these Obamian degrees? AOTL wisdom says no. For the majority of the vicious anti-Obama racists, it’s not just that Obama is part black; it’s that he’s part black AND from the opposite end of the political swing set. They perceive Obama as the very thing D.W. Griffith warned against in “Birth Of A Nation” which was the free Negro getting his way over you. This inner sanctum thinks Obama is going to come into their homes and blacken their stuff when everyone knows Obama would be arrested before he even got to knock on the door. While these same people would take issue with Keys’ race they would cut him some slack for at least talking the talk about things that help them sleep at night like a governmentless, taxless, land with fairies and unicorns. Well, scratch the fairies.

I guess the perfect black president I envision is darker than Obama and more liberal. I want to see Birthers with their bags packed and ready to go. I want to see the “Obama’s an Arab” faction’s fear that their own heads are going to explode. I want to see Lush Rimbaugh build a space rocket like Billy Bob Thornton did in that movie I don’t think did too well. If this blog got some real traffic, I’d be accused by bigots as being anti-white. To be clear, I’m not anti-white. I’m anti-bigot. There’s a big difference.