Pass this Ab-Toning Jobs Bill!: A Lesson in Marketing


The current Republican Congress' crowning achievement was a bill to repeal so-called Obamacare. They called it "Repealing the Job-Killing Health Care Law Act." Reinstating preexisting conditions was not the priority of voters in 2010, but Republicans had already promised to repeal Obamacare the moment it passed, given their first chance to do so. By the time their first chance arrived, jobs and the economy had become the number one concern. So instead of actually expending any energy on job creation, Republicans tacked the term "job-killing" on to their mediocre opus, used their majority to pass it, and then called it a session. As predicted, the Repealing the Job-Killing Health Care Law Act died in the Senate.


Because they do the bidding of the greediest rich people, Republicans perceive themselves as the designated drivers of America, and when they don't have the keys, they get very impetuous and feisty. This causes them to go negative and do things like tack terms like "job-killing" onto bills they know will never become law. All that tells the American people is that Republicans have no positive vision. 


Some may poo poo the notion of positive vision in marketing, but positive vision is what sells snake oil. People who hawk wonder-palcebos do it by telling suckers that their fake product will regrow hair or smooth thighs. What sells is a "miracle hair growth formula" and not a "formula that kills baldness." What the Republicans should have sold was the "Penis-Enlarging Repeal of the Health Care Law" or the "Breast-Lifting Repeal of the Health Care Law." They still would have failed in the Senate, but more people would have bought it. 


A simple shift of modifiers would have changed Republican fortunes just a little bit. Currently Congress has an approval rating of about negative five. Meanwhile, Obama is setting up his tent all around the country selling his jobs bill to the people. He's got people yelling "pass this bill" which is reminiscent of the JG Wentworth TV spot in which people yell "it's my money and I want it now." This is somewhat of a positive visions since jobs are positive, but he is also employing the call to action which has the same effect. Odds are that the jobs package won't pass, but he is controlling the message. The people are clearly on his side. 


This is the Obama people forget about when he seemingly disappears for months at a time while Republicans throw kitchen sinks at him. There is more to Obama than the guy that low-balls himself in negotiations. The guy can get out there and sell when he has to. It does help that he is getting the assist from the Republicans who are technically coming out against jobs. It seems like a counterintuitive message on their part, but there was a time when Redubyacans could get away with selling any old nonsense. As I always say, people tend to err in favor of the pro-establishment party no matter how ridiculous their message is. For several possible reasons that won't be tackled here, this is changing. Even in a bad economy, people have had enough of the Redubyacan bullshit. The effectiveness of their 2+2=5 messaging is slipping as Americans slowly come to. 


Michele Bachmann's lying ass is finding this out the hard way. The last positive message she had was $2 a gallon gas. We saw how well that worked which leads us to the next lesson: people only believe ridiculous positive messages when they promise to improve our physical shortcomings. If Bachmann had promised everyone they would lose 10 pounds by voting for her, we wouldn't be counting the days until she drops out race.


This week is starting off with a political bang as Redubyacans look for a way to message against Obama's popular call to raise taxes on millionaires. Will they counter with a positive message of calls to support butt-firming tax cuts? How about wrinkle-eliminating freezes on tax hikes? Nope. They're going with "class warfare." The good news is that the class warfare message has already been tested. The bad news is that it didn't work. Republicans still think it's the time when you could just say "weak on defense" and win. Those days are over. The Republican message machine needs a new makeover. Is there a pill for that?

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