Yes, Virginia, There Are Black Republicans (?) Part I

The website for the RNC, http://www.gop.com/ (instead of rnc.com for some reason) has a banner across the top that says "GOP." The "O" in GOP is a portrait of a presumed Republican. When you refresh the page a new face appears. It's a no-brainer for keeping Chip occupied for about fifteen minutes: How many black faces will pop up in this little RNC hustle and what can I discern of them with my expert knowledge of Blackness?

She may very well be a Republican. The likelihood of a black person being a Republican increases the older they are (no offense, ma'am). Older generations of black people backed the GOP because it was the Party of the Great Emancipator. Someone should probably tell them it wasn't a deal with the devil; Just because a Republican freed the slaves 145 years ago doesn't mean you have to vote for a Sarah Palin or even a Mitt Romney today. But who knows. Maybe she's itching for that upper class tax cut.

Like me, Mr. Plaid Shirt voted for a few Republicans in his life if he really liked the candidate or if the Democrat was someone like Joe Lieberman. But that doesn't make him a Republican, really.

Ah, Edward Brooke. This guy actually is a Republican. He was the first black senator elected in the 20th century. Fun fact: He also banged Barbara Walters.

Okay. This is just something you know. Here is a woman who calls her friends "Girrrrrrrrrrrrrl." No woman who refers to her friends as "Girrrrrrrrrrrrrl" follows it up with a right-wing tear. Example: "Girrrrrrrrrrrrrl. I told you not to vote for Barack Obamas." I say NOT Republican.

She's just married to the guy in the plaid shirt.

Okay. She's not black. I just wanted to comment on how much fun she must be on a date.

Now, this guy believes America is the greatest country in the world. There's not a thing you can't achieve if you put your mind to it. The Market is God's gift to people with a little bit of creativity and who don't mind breaking a sweat. There's no dream like the American Dream. And he needs to borrow five bucks.